The man Who Killed His Wife

I want to try and be serious because this is
a serious issue . We have heard during the
week that the hapless guy who killed his wife
was sentenced to death . It was said that he
inflicted on his wife multiple stab wounds
which led to her death. Upon hearing the
verdict, he collapsed and screamed ‘what
will happen to his daughter’ this is a tragic
case and a lesson for all of us both male
and female.
I have head all sort of arguments on both
sides . The women feel that it is their right
not to be beaten no matter the level of
provocation , the men feel that once they
have been provoked they reserve the right
to lash out . You see the problem here is
that the more the provocation , the more the
lashing and eventually we will get to the
point where we would be having a murder
case on our hands .
We must all learn the virtues of patience ,
we must all learn how to be respectful even
at the height of provocation .
Communication lines must always be kept
open , we must restrain ourselves from using
psychologically damaging words . Words that
would follow the person for the rest of his
life . This always leads to violence.
I have a friend who says, that once she is
angry, she should be left alone for
sometime . Once you do that , she will on her
own calm down and start talking reasonably .
But when you continue to harangue her , or
try to calm her down she gets very irritable
and lashes out . This would lead to escalation
and actions that both sides would regret .
For our womenfolk, please refrain from
cursing and abusing your partners mothers ,
it could lead to murder . Women know the
important role of mothers in the lives of
their men and that is usually the first port
of call in a fight. I have seen men who,
rather than get physical , breakdown and
cry . I know the women are just trying to get
back at the men and they believe using their
mother is the shortest cut , but I beg it ’s
usually a recipe for disaster.
For men , don’t cheat, don’ t lie and try your
best to take care of your women. If you do
all these and respect and love them , you will
not see any wahala that might lead you to
violence .
Domestic violence is terrible . It can damage
the woman forever and this damage can take
years to heal if at all. Let the case of
Arowolo although pitiable be a rallying point
for us all. See now, two lives have been lost
and a poor girl is going to live the rest of
her life with the stigma that her father
killed her mother and he was hanged. All
these when simple patience could have
solved the matter .
Lastly, for our women, if you feel so bad
about something and you want to get even ,
just sit down on a chair and be crying. Don’ t
say anything , don’ t tell him know why you
are crying , just be crying and you will see
the gentle bear in him come out . For the
guys , if you are really upset, take your
father in law out . He will calm you, give you
good advise cos he would have had a lot of
experience dealing with his wife , her
mother.
But much more importantly , learn how to
say sorry genuinely. Kneel down, look into
her eyes and say sorry just as the alert
would be hitting her phone and you will see
transformation .
God help us all and please remember
Arowolo in your prayers, maybe Fashola can
spare him